Slowing down

Take a minute. Take 5. Slow down, you’re moving way too fast. Got to make the morning last… heh, sorry. Sometimes my fingers just keep typing.

We sometimes run through life so quickly that we don’t take the time to smell the flowers…or is it roses? Who knows. WHO CARES!

Take a deep breath. Read to your kids. Give your wife/husband a hug just because you love them. Go do something you’ve always wanted to do, but never dared to. Life is too short to keep running so fast that you never see things flying by you unappreciated or un-looked at. (yeah, so my grammar sucks, it’s my blog )

I’ve been running around like a loon for the last several weeks and months, slowly working up a killer of a stress pile. I’ve had a bunch of stuff finish up, happen, resolve itself and it just occurred to me that I’ve been fairly absent from my own life because I’m too damn worried about what’s next, and how am I going to handle that, or waiting for THIS to happen and can’t do much until it does, etc.

It all starts with a breath. Going to take a deep one, finish up a thing or two, and go home and spend a nice weekend with family and friends and hopefully have a chance to rehook into my own life.

Fae – thank you for all of your help, love, support, and just putting up with my grumpy ass. I love you more than life.

Making Sushi with Gillian

Since Gillian has been diagnosed with Celiac disease, we’ve been trying to find ways to get her to eat more diverse foods than gluten free(gf) mac and cheese and gf grilled cheese and grilled chicken. I knew enough to download a translated card from the Celiac Disease foundation that listed the instructions and asked a few questions in several languages so the guys at our japanese restaurant could understand and make her sushi. They did, and she loved it.

Problem is, it’s really expensive. So for the holidays, Gillian bought me a sushi kit – a book, some implements and a wish to make it with me. I’m gonna say no to that face? Don’t think so.

	First things first. Pour the rice into a big bowl that isn’t white. Why not white? The first thing you have to do is make sure that you rinse the rice to pull off any excess starch and ‘dust’. Put the rice into the bowl and put in water so it’s totally submerged and then some.
	You’ll need to mix it around so you get all of it ‘clean’. Gillian kinda liked this part
	Once it’s relatively clear, you’re good to go. Drop it in the rice cooker. If you don’t have one, google what you’ll need to do. My roomie from college gave me the one we used and we love it.
	Gillian likes cooked shrimp so we decided on a cucumber, mango, and shrimp roll. Yeah, she’s nuts for mango. The key to cooking the shrimp is to use wooden skewers. You slide it into the shrimp, trying to keep it inside the shell, but not piercing the shrimp itself. The skewers are so when you cook them, they don’t curl up. Curled shrimp is pretty freakin hard to put in a roll from what I hear. We got jumbo shrimp from the Wegmans counter, so they were iced, but not frozen. Get them de-veined too. eww.
	If you’ve eaten at enough sushi places and watched them (plus a lot of Iron Chef), you know that you don’t chop up the cucumber. You pare it like you’re peeling an apple, just make it one continuous sheet of cucumber. I managed to get 3/4 of the cuke peeled like this before I broke it Gillian peeled the skin off initially and then sliced the sheet into strips, of course eating the ones that were too thick
	For those of you who have made sushi before, I know, this looks really sloppy. KEY NOTE TO MAKING SUSHI – WAIT FOR THE RICE TO COOL. I almost burned all the skin off the tips of my fingers spreading this out. Hot sushi also tends to melt or tear the nori. Here we have the bamboo mat with a sheet of nori (seaweed) on top spread with the rice. Don’t do it all the way to the edge, leave about 1/5 of the roll free so you don’t have too much. Another key note – spread it thin or it’ll be one big ball of rice. The other thing I learned is that my ingredients are too close to the middle, needed to bring them towards me a bit more.
	Here’s my first roll, cut into pieces. Key Note: hot/warm rice doesn’t cut well. Also: having a container with 4 parts water, 1 part rice-wine vinegar that you can dip the knife into is ESSENTIAL. As you can see, it’s not cut well here. Knife was plenty sharp, I was pushing down too hard, and the rice got too sticky on the knife.
The first roll is finished: Matt & Gillian make sushi from Matt Cushing on Vimeo.
	As you can tell by the thumbs up, I got better as I went along
We’re done: We’re done making Sushi from Matt Cushing on Vimeo.

All in all, lots of fun, and something we’ll definitely do again

Ack! Been too long!

I’ve been so busy lately that I didn’t even realize it’s been a while since I updated.  I think I’ve been waiting for enough time to download the pics and movies I took the other day when I made sushi for the first time with Gillian.  Tre yummy btw if I do say so.  I’ll post about that tonight hopefully.

Feeling okay in the elbow department thankfully.  Went through class on Wed with little to no discomfort, tho I forgot to wear the brace, but I seem to be okay still.   Currently wearing it because of a twinge I felt this morning.  Hoping it’ll go away.  Tho I kinda feel achy all over, not sure if it’s from lack of sleep or what.

Aidan’s winter concert was yesterday, and I gotta tell you…they’re all 7th graders, but they are really pretty good.  The Wind Ensemble is made up of both 7th and 8th, and they were very good.  I’m really proud of my kiddo.

Anyway, Fae’s feeling much better both physically and emotionally which has made life so much sweeter knowing my honey’s back

I’ll post more about the sushi when I can download the pics.

Oh yeah, I’m designing a website too – http://campceliac.org  That’s where my girlie goes for a week of camp for the last two years and really loves it.

Almost…cut my…

Hair?  No, sorry.  No references to CSNY today.  Actually I’m growing a goatee, not sure about it tho.  Hmm, I should take a pic when I get home.

No, this is in reference to cutting something else.

I’ve been having issues with my elbow that make it next to impossible to practice Kendo on any kind of regular basis.  I got a cortisone shot before the holidays, and had two weeks off from Kendo for the holidays.  Nice and rested, I worked from home this past Tuesday.  Got excited to go and get my ‘rah rah’ s out as my sister puts it.  I had a bit of a hangnail on my big toe and I went to clip it.

Problem is, as I was about to, the cat jumped on the bed.  Yep, I took off a huge chunk of the top left part of my left big toe.  SHIT SHIT SHIT! I screamed getting up and hightailing it to the bathroom to run it under cold water and then sat on the floor like a total idiot putting pressure on the damn thing.  I finally get it to stop bleeding (like 20 min later) and bandage, gauze, and wrap in tape so it looks like my toe is the size of a baseball.

To add to the equation, about a hour later I get an email from my Sensei saying her teacher, Kato Sensei, is coming to run class.  PERFECT!

So we go and I get dressed and wrap it a bit more and go through stretching and warm ups and I’m feeling good.  Toe doesn’t hurt too much and I’m feeling a good sweat coming on, jacked up for once instead of having to sit out with my elbow.  We go to put our armor on and line up for suriyashi (it’s a moving drill that you move quickly across the gym doing strikes at intervals), and again, I’m feeling good.

And then I look down and realize I’m about to bleed all over the floor.  Everything was soaked through.  AWESOME!

Spent the next 30 min getting it to stop and end up watching once again.  AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHRRRRRGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

Picked up some cool tips even tho I couldn’t practice, so it wasn’t a total loss and Aidan got to spar with Kato Sensei which is a plus.  of course I DIDN’T!!!! GGGRRRRRRRRRRRRRR.

okay, I’m done feeling sorry for myself.  It’s already feeling pretty okay, should be fine by Tues.  Please say a prayer my elbow doesn’t start hurting again by then

Sawks Talk:Offseason

Okay, so we got Lackey, Scutaro, Cameron, Hermida, and now Beltre.  We lost Alex Gonzales & even more importantly, Jason Bay.

I’m not sure we’re all that much better off for next season.  I think Scutaro is better than Alex Gonz, so that’s positive.  Surprised that happened, but it seems like they just wanted to switch teams.  Sorry, but as a hitter Cameron is done, fielding?  He’s definitely better than Bay, but Bay’s bat is better.

I’m hopeful that they’ll all hit better in Boston with the Monster only 310 feet away, but I still don’t think we should have dropped money on Beltre when Lowell is a question mark.  Mikey’s a great player, and has been an amazing Red Sock, but even with his injuries and uncertainty, I wouldn’t have made the deal for Beltre.  I would have saved up all my chips and made a play for Adrian Gonzales from San Diego.  Never know, they might do it anyway, using Lowell as a trade piece.

Ideally, I would love to see Youk move to 3rd to make room for Adrian, and have the Sox really start working on this Phenom – Iglesias – to get him ready for the bigs.  Maybe Theo Epstein is working on some midseason trades, who knows.

What it all comes down to is I REALLY don’t believe he’s setting the Red Sox up to compete with the Yankees.  Especially getting Johnson at DH and Granderson to take over in left or center.  They’re going to dominate again next year.  We may make it to the playoffs, but I dunno.

And even tho Lackey’s wife is a total hottie, I still think he’s a bad mouthed, spoiled little brat and I don’t see him p

Back to work? Aww MAN!

Commuting from White Plains to Long Island (say Lawn Guyland if you want to pronounce it right), was nice for a few days, but picking the kids up on Wed and coming home was nice.  Finally got to sleep in my own bed, cuddled up next to Fae and worked half day for New Years Eve (and my anniversary – HAPPY 15th HONEY!) was nice as well.  The rest of the day was pretty easy, Aidan went to spend the night at a friends and Gillian went to spend NYE with my inlaws.  We were SUPPOSED to go out to dinner and a movie and then go join them at their next door neighbors, but it started sleeting like all hell had broken loose, and since my inlaws live up on a mountain, getting Gillian was pretty much out of the question.  Fae and I opted to cruise home and save the money and watch something anyway.  Shucks….New Years Eve, our 15th Anniversary, and no kids.

So disappointed !!  NOT!

The rest of the weekend was nice and relaxing, watched a bunch of movies, helped the kids finish up projects for school, got some writing done as well as a few hours of website work.  Going to take down the tree sometime this week hopefully.

Back to work tomorrow, have to drive Aidan into school with his project for his latin class: he built a replica of the roman armor, shield, and spear, and I didn’t help him all that much at all and it looks really cool!

Happy New Year

So what are your resolutions for this year?  Going to do less of this, or more of that?  A guy I follow on Twitter posted this and it really made me think:

If you aren’t sure of your resolutions are.What labels would you like ppl to apply to you in 2010? Use the answers to create ur resolutions.

So what kind of labels would you like people to apply to you at the end of 2010?

New Years Eve 1994 – Happy Anniv Honey!

I woke up this morning to put in my half day working from home (thanks Matt!) (yeah, i love working from home) looked out the window, and saw the snow coming down. Reminded me of a day 15 years ago today when it was snowing and there was this girl upstairs in her parents bedroom getting ready to marry me.

We had the ceremony done by a justice of the peace, written by us, in her parents house. About 50 people came, relatives, friends from NJ And TX and NY and just had a really nice day. Hectic until the minute everyone started walking down the stairs. Then it was like magic. From where I was standing in the living room, I Could see everyone in the main hallway watching her come down the stairs. Seeing her when she rounded the corner was like magic, like everything was right and all the planning, stress, and nervousness was all worth it and we would be one finally. We’d lived together for a year, but this was totally different.

The only thing I remember about the ceremony was her. I was so nervous, I almost wiped off the still drying nail polish from her fingernails. That and her dress came undone about halfway through and someone had to refasten it. It was just a collar button, so it wasn’t anything tragic. Everyone had a good chuckle.

Now it’s 15 year later, we’ve moved from Texas to NJ, We’ve had two wonderful children, and I’ve had about 3 or 4 jobs. It’s never been easy, and sometimes it’s been work. It’s always been full of love, friendship, and care. I pledged myself to this wonderful woman long ago in that livingroom across town and I would go back and do it in a second.

I love you my Fae, now and always. These are for you:

You turned life around
made me realize the man
I always could be.

You said yes to me
long ago. Say yes every
day till end of time.

Watching you come back
from numbness and hopeless
is seeing you born.

My partner my friend.
Stay with me now and always.
Put your hand in mine.

Happy 15th baby.
Yours now and always,
Matthew

Dear Internet

So today I woke up an hour later than I usually do because I’ve been staying at my Aunt’s in Long Island. Fae went home on Sunday so she could get to her iron infusion on Monday. I’ve been commuting from Lido Beach and it’s only been taking me 45 min in the morning, talk about a freakin treat. I’m convinced that people in NY don’t know how to drive, but as I think back on it, I realize that most of the moron’s that I encountered on my way home were out of staters.

CLUE TO PEOPLE WHO DRIVE IN THE TRISTATE AREA – THE LEFT LANE IS FOR PASSING!!!!! GET THE F OUT OF THE LANE IF YOU’RE GOING 10 MILES UNDER THE SPEED LIMIT!!!!!

Okay, I feel better now I’m especially talking to the idiot with the Volkswagen with the Georgia plates, yeah you Chuckie. MOVE!

The kids have all been hanging out with their cousins, so it’s been a nice visit for them to have all 6 of them around at once. We took a group pic of the kids together for my Mom’s birthday, and it came out really well. I’ll try to post a copy.

So today was pretty uneventful, got to work at 8:15, which for my normal 1.5 hour minimum commute in the AM was miraculous, and had a pretty easy day getting things moving, pushing out finished code and had a meeting or three. Left around 5:30 and was at my parents by 7 for dinner which again, was pretty miraculous. Kids were pretty spent so we came back to my Aunt’s and I had Aidan take a shower because he smelled like a combination of sheep and mud puddle. Going to work on some side projects for a little bit and then crashola.

“Dad, do you know what a weenus is?” is the question I was just asked by my daughter. How the hell am I supposed to answer that. Oh, okay, it’s the “loose skin around your elbow” or so that’s what my 10 going on 30 yr old daughter is telling me. Time for bed Gillian.

Aidan’s on the phone with Fae right now, she’s actually at her BFF’s and I think she might be staying the night. I’m out, night folx.

Stressful Greetings? Ugh

Just shoot me

No, nothing as bad as I make it out to be. Just a lot of stuff up in the air that’s stressing me to the maximum levels. You ever get hit from so many directions that you don’t feel like eating, you’re constantly nauseous, and every time you take a deep breath you feel like you’re either not getting enough air, or you’re about to throw up? Yeah, passed that phase about a week and a half ago.

I’m coming to the conclusion that one of the factors to my stress level is that I may have social anxiety. Once I get somewhere, I know I’ll be fine, but it’s the lead in to the event whether it be dinner with my inlaws, or holidays at my folx, or a conference presentation I have to do – I always tend to project anything and everything that could possibly go wrong and take that to the nth degree.

So we’re invited to Fae’s cousins wedding in Brooklyn. It’s at the Brooklyn Museum of Art no less – schwank!!! It was a beautiful wedding, with a wonderful Yeminite Jewish ceremony (his father is from Yemen), awesome food and drink hour and excellent dining and dancing. Man, jews know how to party! Just an all around good time. Problem was, I was dreading it. Not because of the people there, I love Fae’s extended family, they’re a blast. But because I was going to have to leave my house and go somewhere and it’s easier to just stay home I felt my stress levels rising. Of course I wasn’t going to give into it, tho the Blizzard we drove through to get home was pretty amazing and almost decided for us, but I’m very glad we were able to make it.

There still exists the social anxiety. I feel like becoming a hermit with my family and just never go out. What is up with that? I think it’s my stress levels being so increased, my elbow problems, and all the shit that is going on with Gillian’s school which I won’t even get into. Plus I’ve not been working out much because my elbow is hurting so bad and mostly because i’m so damn lazy. I know when I don’t regularly exercise, I get really a

I guess I’m just asking for some calming energy sent my way, everyone take a deep breath for me, okay?