So typical midlife crisis would normally involve a shiny sports car, an affair, or chucking it all and moving to another country.
I just retooled a big computer I used a few years ago for development and with some SERIOUS help from a good friend, I now have the beginnings of a Windows Server that i’m going to turn into my own personal Media/Project server.
I’ve been bummed lately that I haven’t been able to write code or do much that fuels my creative spark, so I’m going to ramp out this box so it runs Sharepoint and SQL Database stuff. Yeah, expect some seriously geeky posts from me coming out soon.
I like my job, I really do. I just want to do some of the stuff I worked on most recently in development like business intelligence and reporting in general.
Lets see what happens. So far, I have Windows installed and it’s running 100 updates. Lets see how many more it has once I get the database stuff installed:)
I’ve been doing a lot of thinking lately, seeing my life as it unfolds in front of me every day and have come to the conclusion that something needs to change. A guy I knew in high school suddenly is dead from a heart attack, my 46th birthday is this week, and there are a lot of things I want to do in this life. Then Fae posted something on FB that really made me sit back and think about what i’m NOT doing about all of that.
“We must be willing to let go of the life we’ve planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us.” – Joseph Campbell
I have this concept of what I have to do to support my family is keeping me from doing what I want to do, that a career is something that is necessary and excludes the ability to do anything else.
Life is too short, and whether you believe in heaven, reincarnation, or this is all we have, I realized that nothing is going to change until I take the first step. Every part of me is scared that this will be yet another failure start that I get myself into, but doing nothing is never going to get anything started. Life is what you make of it, and if I can get out of my own way, I think I can make this work.
So I signed up for a creative writing 10 week course that I can do online at http://www.writingclasses.com/index.php. The ability to do it when I have time instead of an actual time is going to allow me to do something constructive instead of spending hours on facebook trying to figure out what my spirit animal is, or see pictures of someone else’s life.
Wish me luck 🙂