mattdaddy.net info that bounces inside my brain that makes sense to me, maybe you.

trapped

My Aunt's birthday celebration is this weekend, so Fae and I are in Lane Bryant...and we're still here.

How can you tell time in a black hole? I've heard 'the first cut is the deepest' by Sheryl Crowe twice now.

Dude...someone shoot me please. Quickly. If I hear that dude singing about 'Sumthin Luscious', I'm going postal.

Someone send in that Coors train to rescue me. Too bad I don't drink anymore...still

SAVE ME!!!

My kitchen exploded

We've had a gnat or two flying around the house, thought it was some fruit or something else.

Until my wife opened the cabinet under the sink to get something and they practically swarmed. Cleared away a lot of the bottles to see not only was the floor buckling, there were small pools of moldy nasty water - hence, the gnats.

Clear out all the stuff, poke around in there and found the problem. The pipe out of my garbage disposal becomes unlodged when something big is in there and sprays it all over the place. Nice eh? So I mop up the pools, and realize that the floor is a shelf and it need to come out. It practically disintegrates in my hands (thank god, seriously. I wasn't happy about ripping it all out) and comes out fairly easily. And the gods of karma must have been smiling because there was no liquid on the floor under neath.

So we went to home depot, got an extender for the garbage disposal and some flooring to replace the shelf in there. Cut the pieces measured everything pretty much perfectly. Something was nagging at me tho. It had been sagging in two places. Why? Who cares?!?!

So I put down a cover to be able to just pull out and wash when I have to. We cleaned up and made some dinner. I go back in to put all the stuff back underneath. What's there?

A puddle.

Turns out, it's from the insta-hot. An insta-hot is something that gives you almost boiling water, and considering the amount of tea my wife drinks, it's a necessity. We're on our second one. The water was dripping down the plug. Nice eh? So we're calling a plumber to come and either replace it, or fix it. From where the water is coming, I'm thinking it'll be him replacing the unit.

Great. So much for me feeling good about my plumbing skills.

Guys looking stoopid

Something has been bothering me for the last several years, and I know, I shouldn't bitch or moan because women have been victimized for so long....

At first it bothered me that so many of the commercials lately are concentrated not on the big boobed bimbo or some other scantily clad woman trying to sell you what ever is so unrelated it's not even funny, but on the 'Stoopid Husband' principal. Lets take a product and somehow sell it by exploiting the perceived inability of a man to have a coherent thought or remember an anniversary or birthday.

I'm all for empowering women and being equal and trying to have a normal society, but I think that selling products by putting down guys, well, shit, lets just expand the post to putting down ANYONE, in a humorous manner is uncool, and truthfully puts me off.

Case in point - I just saw an ad online for the new 8G Nokia. "My nokia will do anything" slogan that has a guy hooked up to a lie detector program on the phone while his wife asks why he forgot their anniversary and he stands there lying about why he forgot and the phone saying "Lying". When he finally says something to the effect of "I'm going to take you out to dinner to make up for it" she gets a satisfied look on her face and says "That's what I thought" or something along those lines.

Why is that funny? Why does that sell?
For that matter, why do products with the aforementioned big boobed blonde sell? Is it all about "What's the current hook?" and who can we exploit, or in the case of my problem - who can we make fun of - to sell a product?