mens room etiquette

So I was thinking that there are several things that are done or not done in the mens room, I wanted to see if anyone else noticed this as well.

  • Never make eye contact, unless everything is zipped up and you’re standing at the sink.
  • Always look straight ahead when at the urinal.
  • If there are three urinals and someone is using the one on the left, always use the one all the way on the right.
    • if someone is using the middle one, there’s obviously something wrong – use one of the stalls.
    • If 2 of the three are being used, obviously, use a stall.
  • If you’ve just had indian, mexican, or really bad chinese food – you have an obligation to courtesy flush at least 3x.
    • some people don’t know about the courtesy flush to begin with, so my expectations on this one are low.
  • If you have an upset stomach and need to go, several things will ALWAYS go wrong:
    • as your going into the stall, you’ll see someone you know and you’ll have to hold it in until you think they’ve left the bathroom.
      • 9 times out of 10, it’s your boss or your employee
    • the periodic air freshener will be beeping, telling you it needs to be changed
    • All of your courtesy flushing will not do a damn bit of difference and either your boss or employee will walk in the minute you’re coming out of the stall

Anything to add?  Men or Women…. I’m sure the womens bathroom etiquette is totally different.